[Latino4life]

Originally Posted by Warrior

To a great extend, I agree with Captain. It's a difference in culture, to use a cliché. Asking for money by BG's is all part of the greater scheme, where status and family background are important - very important - for all Thai, and where those who are rich pick up the bill. All bills, at risk of losing their face when not picking them up.
And as a farang, you are rich by definition.
That having said, that same cultural difference holds many more aspects, you might or might not like.
Always follow your heart. Your heart knows where you will feel at home best.

I agree Captain made an exelent point, I've been thinking long and hard yet I'm still not certain what to do. You're absolutely right about they assuming just because a guy is a farang his rich... I told the thai lady that I'm noway near rich, I do make a nice living but not rich and she gave me this "yeah right" look... I don't think I'm quite ready to get seriously involved with someone, at least not get married anyway. Thanks for your opinion and advice

Originally Posted by marc26

latino,
i dont know if you want to share it, but it would be easier to give advice if we knew the misunderstanding.
as far as the tg, if u get a request for money in that short period of a time, your a customer and nothing more, plain and simple.

Hehehe... I don't want to share the misunderstanding part coz it's kinda private, however that is resolved and it's not an issue anymore. It did lots of damage but it doesn't hurt anymore since I finaly realized what she meant. You have alot more experience than me when it comes to BGs and TGs so I guess you're right and I guess I'm a customer to her. Somehow it doesn't bother me, in fact I already sent her some money and I even may send her some more. Stupid it may seem to many if not all of you but I see it in a difirent way coz the wonderful treatment I received from this BG for the 10 days I was with her costed me less than 1 night with a "call girl" in any European country even if I send her a few more grands and the most cute thing is that she offers me to stay with me for free I know it's most certain a strategic move but still cute... However if I would learn that my filipina princess is in for the money it would break my heart. Thanks for the attention Marc.

Originally Posted by Mav

L4L

You have not really indicated whether you are actually looking for a wife....presuming you are and that you could afford to support someone, l think l would be inclined to make a Tourist Visa for the Phillipina girl seeing you have had a long history with her and you still seem reasonably keen on her....and see how it goes....once that is completed and she is back home maybe things will be a whole lot clearer. If you are not that keen on her anymore, try and move on....maybe difficult but in the long run good for both of you.

I'm not looking for a wife, if I meet a girl that I feel I want to spend the rest of my life with I would go for it... I think... I gotta admit I can imagine my life without the filipina girl eventhou we're apart but still we text each other everyday and exchange mails and pics. And yes I could support a girl and my self even here in farang land. I thought about getting her here but if I do so I'm certain she'll get pregnant and if that happens I'll marry her coz then it's not just the two of us, it's also an innocent life involved and I won't turn my back, she knows that... Thank you for your advice

Originally Posted by Lucky7

Dude I know exactly what you're talking about. I am Filipino and I did meet a beautiful Filipina girl in a trip to the Philippines 10 yrs ago. Filipinos are very family and marriage oriented. It's not uncommon for a girl to have a pen-relationship with someone doesn't see very much in person but become very attached. Feelings linger a while as well. There was still some strong tension between us a few years back after a followup trip even if the girl that I had met before had married and had kids.

As far as not asking for money, it may be possible that she's thinking in the long term. I mean she's could be looking for someone to take care of her or her family's future. She's probably serious relationship, no screwing around material.

Captain, is almost spot on with cultural differences. You'll deal with less differences because is the Philippines very Western in their ideals. The Western pop culture and TV shows are really popular. Hell, they teach their curriculum entirely in English with the exception of the Talaglog language class.

It all depends on what you want. Only you can telll yourself what you want to do. I've never been with a Thai girl so I don't know how they're like but I can tell you your Filipina girl isn't a bad choice if you're ready for a serious relationship. You already know each other sometime. You even spoke to her mom which is a big thing. Getting serious is the next logical progresssion.

If you're not ready but just like the affection and company you can stick with the TG you're currently dating. The only thing is it may lead somewhere or not.

Or there's the last option. You can see both during your upcoming trip and see where you heart or loins lead you.

Kumusta Lucky!
I know many filipinas are into this penpalship thingie and looking for a potential husband. My filipina beauty is no different, however what I admire is her persistance and endurance. And the fact that she's not a BG or gogo girl. In fact when we met I got the strong impression she's an innocent girl trying to appear "experienced" and with every girl I met in Thailand it was the other way around, experienced girls trying to appear innocent. I also agree that she's not screwing around, I offered to help her aout at least with some money to cover text expencies but she politely refused my proposal. Somehow if I would have to choose I would choose my filipina girl but I don't know if we should go that far and get married, at least not yet. I was married before (with a girl from Finland) but that didn't go well and we got divorced thou she's still my best friend and she actually adviced me to write down every time I think about my filipina girl and everytime I think about the thai lady. I measured in "texts" and I text my filipina about 10-15 times a day regardless how many texts she send me, which is about 8 a day give or take. While I text the thai girl an avarage of 5 texts coz that's the amount she sends me, well soemtimes she send me upto 10 but not very often since she has no money at least that's what she says, I bet she has more money than I do. If I could have it my way I would like my filipina girl to give me more time and I would like to "explore" more of what Thailand has to offer. How things goes with the thai lady is not very relevant but I would very much like to be her friend if anything. Thanks a bunch for your opinion.

Originally Posted by Roaddawg

I don't have much experience but learning every day. Sounds like you are heading in the right direction. As for as the money question, it's my understanding the Philippina and Thai ladies expect or might ask for some type of financial contribution for helping their family members. The main thing is to let her know what you can and can not provide. And let her know that you need money for the two of you to survive and live in a financial comfort zone as well.

If you are really hooked on the girl who's asking for financial assistance, talk it over with her and see if you can get an understanding. If she truly want you for you, she'll understand and work with you. Right now I have a few friends in the Philippines and a few in Thailand. I've met one in Thailand. It's equal across the board. 1 or 2 of the filipinas are self supportive and 1 or 2 are very short on cash. The same with my friends from Thailand.

Talk it out. See if you can work it out and go from there.

Best wishes.

Thanks for advice Roaddwag, I can imagine my filipina would like to help out her family, actually her two sisters however she has never mentioned any amounts and never asked for any financial help during the years I have known her, in fact she told me that she is old fashion and woul like to stay home and take care of the household and family (children and me) but if there is a need of more income she would be happy to work and earn money too. That was kinda cute and I wouldn't mind that but in Sweden she'll get about 500 dollars every month just for being unemplyed and I figured that she can send to her family... When it comes to the thai lady.. Oh dear... That would be impossible for now, I mean stablish some delicated communication since her english is extremly limitated. Mine is not very good either but at this point it's not possible to communicate with her that seriously. Thanks for your help man!