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Originally Posted by dizbuster
I know looking at her email is not a good thing and I am refraining from doing so, but I suppose my biggest problem now, is not trying to understand the difference in cultures or even thinking too much about her "being mine", but that after 4 months of constantly talking about my next trip and going through all the "why you not come sooner" routine, I am now suddenly informed that I told her 1 week when I have never done so !!
The rest I am coping with and as I have said in previous posts, I do understand that I can't lay a claim to her whilst only being over in LOS twice a year for 2/3 weeks at a time. But to try and make out that I am to blame by saying that I told her something different is quite beyond me, especially seeing that I have already said it's not a problem. All I want her to do is confirm how much time she will spend with me, so I can plan accordingly.
I would like to do the decent thing and tell the hotel that I don't require a second week if I do find myself going to Pattaya for instance, as they will no doubt be able to use the room if given some notice, plus there's another room to be booked in Pattaya. Also, I would prefer to pay for a flight to Bangkok (in order to get to Pattaya) in advance so that I can pay off my credit card before I go over to LOS and it gets hit for a lot more cash !!
I can even understand how a TG would not even come close to understanding why farangs want to be this meticulous in their planning and also why I can't quite get grips with them just drifting through life from day to day. But when asked a straight forward question like, "how long do you want to be with me?" I do expect an answer within a reasonable time and not a sudden cold front appearing, with communication lines being taken down. That is far too much like a typical female-farang reaction !!
Perhaps there is something else I have missed ?
Diz
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Like women everywhere, they are always going to want to blame the problem on you. If she scheduled you for only one week, that is her problem, but she can't admit it, because, in her mind she can't tell you she has another BF. I don't know her, I am just talking out of my ass here, but I know that some of these girls are just not very bright, and when they are confronted by the unexpected(you suggesting that perhaps she has another BF), then they get flustered, and don't know what to say. They can't think fast enough to figure out a way out of their deception. So the easy way out is to try to shift the blame to you, because you "told her you were staying a week." As if that really made any difference. What makes a difference is that she has been found out, and does not know what to say to maintain the illusion anymore! It's just sheer frustration on her part.
You have cracked the illusion. Then "you" made it even worse by suggesting, even if only in her imagination, that you may hook up with an ex or with her mate. When suddenly it's not going her way, whe just can't handle it!!
She will go back to her GFs or mother, then they will examine the situation and make a decision on the correct course of action. If they can think of a good story to salvage the situation, then you will hear from her. She may go to the other guy and try to back him up a week! If there is any possible way to maintain both scenarios, she will figure it out. If not, they will probably decide who has better potential for sponsor, husband, or LT BF. Since you have broken the illusion, you ar eat a disadvantage there. If the other guy is still buying it, hook, line, and sinker, then they will figure the odds are better with him IMHO. Who she likes better probably has little if anything to do with it, as she will probably defer to the judgement of her mother or older sister in matters such as this.
It's frustrating, because it comes so unexpected. But if you don't here from her in 7 days time, then change your plans, and go have the time of your life. I guarantee you that you will find another teerak inside of a week, if that is what you want!!
Again, try not to take it too hard. Give yourself a few days.It is OK to feel bad now, but it will wear off. Think of all the fun you are going to have. Get psyched! And write her off as a loser, if she doesn't contact you with an apology!! It is all her fault! Don't shift the blame to yourself! Just think of where you would be in this situation, if you didn't know the score. It would be much worse. Some may disagree, but as I see it, you did absolutely nothing wrong. You can be sure that she feels that way about her side of the story, as woefully inadequate as it is.
Just my 2 cents worth.
JayBee