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#1
31-10-2005, 22:22
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Thailand Space Program
????????? Can you imagine it!!!!
>>Meeting discusses plans for Thailand to send a man into space At the Siam Bayview Hotel in South Pattaya, a meeting was held prompted by comments from the Prime Minister Thaksin Shinawatra regarding future plans to initiate a space program here in Thailand. He has already set up an astronaut training program and intends to send Thai’s into space within the next 10 years. This meeting was convened by the legal branch of the Ministry of Foreign Affairs and was chaired by Khun Wirapan. Thailand will have to submit their proposal to enter space with the Committee on the Peaceful Uses of Outer Space which is a branch of the United Nations set up in 1959 to review the scope of international cooperation in peaceful uses of outer space, and to study legal problems arising from the exploration of outer space. Saturday 29th October 2005 << 
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#2
31-10-2005, 23:36
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First dancing pole on the moon!
Imagine the press conference... REPORTER: How much will the mission cost? MISSION CONTROL: Up to you. REPORTER: Where will you go? MISSION CONTROL: Up to you. REPORTER: How long will it take? MISSION CONTROL: Up to you. Then comes the launch... MISSION CONTROL: Ground Control to BGnaut - are you ready to go? BGNAUT - No! You showa firt! MISSION CONTROL: Okay, I'm showered - now are you ready to go? BGNAUT - Okay, watch TV little while. MISSION CONTROL: TV broken - are you ready to go? BGNAUT - Up to you! MISSION CONTROL: Fine... what's that sound? BGNAUT - Phone! Oh, is just Teerak! Quiet Please. Halo Teerak, yess buffalo still veeeery sick. Need lots more liquid oxygen, you send money..? MISSION CONTROL: [WHISPER]Tell him your Mama's sick and she needs a new second stage booster..er.. I mean a new hip. There's a sitcom in here somewhere...
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#3
31-10-2005, 23:57
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 why training the thai for space, it's a waste of money . with all the fireworks free for sale in the supermarket ,a few thais must have blown themselves in to orbit the last few years. 555555
__________________
 having a big d*ck doesn't mean u have big money
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#4
01-11-2005, 03:17
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MISSION CONTROL Hello, are you receiving?
BGNAUT Hallo, cannot talk now, teeruk from Sweden on mobile MISSION CONTROL Please prepare for spacewalk BGNAUT Cannot walk, too much sun outside MISSION CONTROL Please prepare for spacewalk BGNAUT No walk, you got money for taxi? MISSION CONTROL Please prepare for spacewalk! BGNAUT I no walk, I hungry I eat now.
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#5
01-11-2005, 04:25
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On the surface of the moon
MISSION CONTROL: OK its time to leave the capsule BGNAUT: Me tired, I sleep MISSION CONTROL: Its time to walk on moon BGNAUT: We go eat food? MISSION CONTROL: There are no food stalls BGNAUT (perplexed): We go seven-11? MISSION CONTROL: There is no seven-11? BGNAUT (struggling): OK you buy me gold? MISSION CONTROL: There is no gold, and there are no gold shops? BGNAUT: You no lub me, you no pay for gold! MISSION CONTROL: Look that has nothing to do with it! Are you leaving now? BGNAUT: Yes I go now! You give me 20 baht for motocycle taxi! See you tonight, teerak?
__________________
"管它黑貓白貓，會抓老鼠的就是好貓"
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#8
01-11-2005, 05:57
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Brilliant thread, thanks guys!
__________________
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#9
01-11-2005, 11:47
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6th January 2549 A.B. (after Bhudda)
KHUN THAKSIN SPACEPORT - picture of Thailands' first spacecraft launch BGAstronaut : How I go to space? Mission Control: UP 2 U! Last edited by landofsmiles : 01-11-2005 at 12:21.
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#10
01-11-2005, 12:31
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GOTTA BIG OUT
 OF THEM THREADSWELL DONE 
__________________
MAY THE BEER BE COLD AND ALL YOUR BETS WINNERS
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#12
01-11-2005, 20:28
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Tyfon
Quote:
55555555 Should probably call it ‘LOSt in Space’.
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#16
02-11-2005, 04:33
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Welcome to the bridge of the USSS (United Siam Space Ship) completely
unfettered Free Enterprise. KIRK - Ensign Noi, I have summoned you to this officers meeting to examine your recent behavior which we feel may not reach the standards expected of a starfleet officer NOI - Big Smile KIRK - Perhaps you would like to explain why you invariably turn up two hours late for bridge duty? NOI - Big Smile KIRK - er, right. Perhaps you can explain your behavior at first contact with the Romulan Star Empire? At this tense diplomatic moment you were observed repeatedly pestering Romulan Senator Ranak for `lady drinks`. NOI - Big Smile KIRK - mmm, Engineer Scott, do you have something to contribute? SCOTTY - Aye captain, well, you know I had a wee store of fine malts. They were substituted for a chemical that the tricorder analysed as `Mekong`, a foul astrigent. I suspect this wee lassie of no good. NOI - Big Smile SCOTTY - As well captain, my records show repeated use of the transporters for short journeys around the ship. NOI - I no like walk KIRK - Well, there is an infestation of Rigelian Jumping Bugs in your quarters. Explain! NOI - I get hungry, must eat KIRK - But our replicators are state of the art, they can be programmed to produce the finest cuisine! NOI - I no like Farang food. KIRK - uuuurggh - Bones, what`s your view? MCCOY - Well Jim, this girls in twice a day with all kinds of imaginary complaints, she`s a hypocondriac! And she`s always pestering for tatoos or boob jobs. I`m a Doctor Jim, not a plastic surgeon! SULU - Yesterday I issued her with a gold com badge and a brand new communicator. Within 2 hours she`d pawned it to a Farengi! NOI - I like you Japanese man, big money. KIRK - There`s only one way to get to the bottom of this. Spock! SPOCK - Captain? KIRK - Prepare to mind meld NOI - You no touch my head! KIRK - Do it Spock! SPOCK - Urrrrrrrrr. I`m making contact captain. Her mind is completely illogical! MCCOY - Break contact Spock, you`re in danger! SPOCK - I`ve severed the link. KIRK - Well Ensign Noi, I think we`ve heard enough. You`re unsuitable for service on this ship, every other word you say is a lie. NOI - YOU SAY I LIE? KIRK - Well, Yes NOI - I NO LIKE YOU ! YOU FAT UGLY OLD BALD FARANG! MCCOY - Well, she`s got you there, Jim.
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#17
02-11-2005, 06:53
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Quote:
Would have been fun if Hoshi Sato had been like Ensign Noi 
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#20
03-11-2005, 23:01
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Thaksin has said he wants to get a Thai into space.....didn't say he would be bringing them back :-)
Last edited by landofsmiles : 03-11-2005 at 23:14.
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#21
04-11-2005, 05:11
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Thailand - A Space Oddity!
Land of Smiles to Falang man, Land of Smiles to Falang man
Take your Vit V pills and put your Condom on Land of Smiles to Falang man, Commencing Pissup, flip-flops on Check your wallet and may Bhudda be with you Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, Four, three, two, one, Piss up! This is MTB to Falang man, You’ve really made the grade And the tailors want to know whose shirts you wear Now it’s time to drink a Black Death if you dare For here Am I sitting in a tuk tuk, no cares for the world Kamagra pills are blue, And and I think I need a poo! (Sorry about that one!) Though I’m drunk, I'm in the land of Smiles, I’m feeling very ill And I think my tuk tuk knows which way to go Tell my ex I loved her very much she knows Land of Smiles to Falang man Your getting head, there’s nothing wrong Can you hear me, Falang man? Can you hear me, Falang man? Can you hear me, Falang man? Can you.... 
__________________
The idea is to die young.........as late as possible.
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#22
04-11-2005, 06:49
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MISSION CONTROL: Its time to walk on moon
BGNAUT: You want Massage? or the Denver version MISSION CONTROL: Its time to walk on moon BGNAUT (perplexed): I tell you, I good girl. You go get LB for that!
__________________
variety is the spice of life. I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy. Mav's a hasher, not a basher, Tell me it ain't so! Mav, he sits on ice, says it feels nice, enjoyed it so much, he did it twice.
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#23
04-11-2005, 07:05
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Hey Major D...................notice I have elevated your rank from Mr to Major in honour of your outstanding services to this board...........and your love of Mr Bowie....and Bgs etc...
Next time yer having trouble sleeping you may like to sing this lovely little lullaby I have penned for your next album................. Again and again I tell myself I'll stay clean tonight but the little blue pills keep hardenning me Oh No Not again Whether Lbs or Bgs...i wanna get on right now Cialis Cialis.....Bob's or Bobsies I don't mind cause I like bothsies I'll Climb up those heavens thighs and give 'em a darn good show bum bum... bum bum bum bum...................... Kind a catchy eh.....................
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#24
04-11-2005, 17:44
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Quote:
The "Bobs or Bobsies" was an absolute stroke of bloody genius Nelson, in a way, just like the great Bowie himself, who I think had a massive influence on me during my pre-pubescent younger years. In fact, so much so, that I am typing this to you here in Baghdad with a big silver lightning streak across |