 |
|
|
#1
03-07-2006, 05:36
|
|||
|
|||
|
wives
Could I ask- in a completely non-judgemental way- about expats/farangs who have Thai wives or long term GFs. What percentage are ex-bar girls?
I suppose this links to another thread about how easy is it to meet non-BGs for long term relationships? Does it actually happen or is it usually a case of falling at some point for a BG that floats your boat?
__________________
"God is dead"- Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche (1844-1900) "Nietzsche is dead"- God (1900) |
| Guest Info |
|
+:+:+ Forum Headquarter +:+:+ |
|
#2
03-07-2006, 05:41
|
||||
|
||||
|
I cant speak for others, but I find this totally inappropriate and very intrusive. How I met my wife, or what she did or didnt do beforehand, is no ones business except ours.
I'll leave the thread open for now to see if others feel the same or not.
__________________
Look you tools, no mod cap!!!! |
|
#3
03-07-2006, 05:44
|
|||
|
|||
Quote:
|
|
#5
03-07-2006, 05:55
|
||||
|
||||
I belive this issue can be very sensitive to discuss around here but as a friend said about his now 55 year old Thai Lady a couple of weeks ago: Well she worked bar long long time ago but she ain´t no bad person just because of that and i belive i have to agree with him
__________________
CS//  
|
|
#6
03-07-2006, 07:33
|
||||
|
||||
|
Quote:
Why don't you go and find out by yourself? F |
|
#7
03-07-2006, 08:26
|
||||
|
||||
|
I think the answer can be given by yourself.
1.) Where do Farang meet their wifes? Mostly in Thailand 2.) What are lonesome farang´s doing in LOS and where do they go? Bars Me thinks this would be the answer in allmost 98%, but its not your business at all. And a question which has been also discussed how to handle it.Also everybody´s own business. But to give you a hint: What do you prefer? A) a girl worked in bar, screwing for money to get food and to support the family or B) A farang chick, still screwing around behind your neck, just for fun To make it clear not all farang women and not all TG´s are like that..You will find good and bad ones everywhere
__________________
Never to old to make yourself a fool  Especially in LOS
|
|
#8
03-07-2006, 13:16
|
||||
|
||||
|
Quote:
Massive assumption, where the hell do you get 98% from? Yet another bullshit statistic made up on the hoof; think before you post. As to the original question. Pretty rude that, absolutely none of your business, and if you think it's being over-sensitive then try asking any other bloke in any other circumstances whether his wife used to be a ******. I think you should withdraw the question and be ashamed of yourself for asking it.
__________________
|
|
#9
03-07-2006, 13:58
|
||||
|
||||
|
Another oddball one Bayleaf..
You seem to have a talent for this..
__________________
Men have only 2 emotional states, hungry and horny.. So ladies, if you see me without an erection, make me a sandwich. |
|
#10
03-07-2006, 14:30
|
|||
|
|||
|
Quote:
Maybe naive to ask outright, but understandable curiosity. We hear so many tales of BGs stringing Farangs along for the money, it's natural to wonder about what proportion of relationships can form long-term stable partnerships . If you were considering the prospect of taking a BG out of the scene, would you not want to have some measure (reassurance) of what the odds were that it would last? Perhaps the sub-text is: "If I were to move to LOS would I be wasting my time starting relationships with BGs or should I put more effort into meeting/wooing so-called 'good-girls'?" Plus it was just an open enquiry - folks don't have to answer: It's not like he has you in a head-lock or anything... K. Last edited by Tyfon : 03-07-2006 at 14:32. |
|
#11
03-07-2006, 15:43
|
|||
|
|||
|
Quote:
Exactly so! As I said originally, it was asked in a completely non-judgemental way. Of course I have been to Thailand many times but don't live there( a bit of a dumb comment by someone- "why don't you go and find out for yourself") and have talked to many BGs over the years and occasionally you come across one and can't help but wonder about forming a long-term relationship with her but what are the chances of it lasting? If the answer to my original question( and a simple rough percentage number would have done) is low, would she be looked down on by other farangs and their non-BG wives/GFs? I am sorry if this thread has touched a raw nerve, especially with Stevem as I had the pleasure of meeting him a couple of trips ago( not that he will remember!), but it only comes about from the niceness of a lot of BGs and my desire to one day live in LOS.
__________________
"God is dead"- Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche (1844-1900) "Nietzsche is dead"- God (1900) |
|
#12
03-07-2006, 16:12
|
||||
|
||||
|
LOL note to self.. Read more carefully..
__________________
Men have only 2 emotional states, hungry and horny.. So ladies, if you see me without an erection, make me a sandwich. |
|
#13
03-07-2006, 16:16
|
||||
|
||||
|
Quote:
No offense taken, but this question gets asked regularly and it does get abit tiresome. I know of alot of guys that have married TG/BG's and are very happy in the relationship, and I also know of alot of failed ones as well. The failed ones do end badly, for the farang that is, never the TG. And no I dont remember meeting you, sorry about that.
__________________
Look you tools, no mod cap!!!! |
|
#14
03-07-2006, 16:17
|
||||
|
||||
|
Quote:
I would think the % is low but.. How many times is the BG close to a similar age as the guy ?? How many times do they have no common interests (even language) ?? How many times is the guy out screwing around cause he can ?? How many times is it based more on money / security than genuine feelings ?? Does the guy really have a relationship oir has he got a combo maid that also sleeps with him ?? I would never right off a relationship or the chance of one simply becuase a girl has been a BG but I would think that a lot of girls who have been around the block end up with a lot of bagagge and I dont mean the Lois Vitton kind.. But theres gems amound the sand and also complete heartless money grabbers in the good girl world too..
__________________
Men have only 2 emotional states, hungry and horny.. So ladies, if you see me without an erection, make me a sandwich. |
|
#15
03-07-2006, 16:29
|
|||
|
|||
|
Quote:
The sort of questions I ask myself. The age one would be ok for a while but maybe not 10 years down the line. There again, the BG would be 10 years older and maybe not in a position to go hunting for someone else! I suppose my question comes from having met one or 2 BGs who I would be proud to call my wife but am I being completely naive even given the amount of time I've spent in LOS? Would I forever have to be thinking of an excuse for where I met her to integrate into where-ever I chose to live? Hopefully it wouldn't be a problem where there is an accepted BG scene. I hasten to add that I am not thinking of any one particular girl at this time! And to Stevem, I'm not at all surprised you don't remember me, I'm one of the quieter ones in LOS! Can't remember seeing this subject on the board before,though. Wouldn't life be so much simpler if so many BGs weren't so nice!
__________________
"God is dead"- Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche (1844-1900) "Nietzsche is dead"- God (1900) |
|
#16
03-07-2006, 16:42
|
||||
|
||||
|
Quote:
You are always so smart steve!! If you read my sentence right you would realize that the 98% is not meant as an absolute number, just to say it might be a very high number. And not to say i am the big expert on that, but just read the threads of this forum and the stories of the BM´s and you see that its like that. I dont want to offend anybody, but in my case, i have no problem to say my GF worked bar, and not "i met her at the university doing some philosophical lessons." It wouldn´t last very long (reading my posts, to get the trueth out.Also out of the dozzen´s thai women i know, married to farangs and living in my town, who worked in the bar scene. So without being judgmental about if she worked bar or not. Its nothing you ask your friends, if you dont know it already,and also not interesting for me,because she is out then. It might be different if we speak about a thai couple , like one of my best friends,who met his girl in thailand during his 2 year stay (holiday). Also some couples are arranged by Thai-Farang couples out of their familys. But as the questions was directed to the BM´s, who most are going around the bar scene, i still have the opinion its a very high quote. But maybe only we germans (me italian grown up and living in germany) are mongerers and take the girls out the bar.So i apologize to you, as i know you are the one who just comes for the culture and the temples to LOS. And finally again, its not my interest and not my business if anybodys GF or wife worked bar or not.But it gives me a laugh if someone tries to "sell" his bride as a virgin if she is not.But good to have a guy like you who tries to make a "face" for the ex-BG´s. And to the original poster: i am sure he just asked for curiosity, thinking the BM´s are open minded, and not with the intention of flaming or to offend anybody.Maybe he is just ashamed to come out with his original question or is in the situation having a EX-BG GF. You should read twice and think twice before posting something like that. regards shark
__________________
Never to old to make yourself a fool Especially in LOS
|
|
#17
03-07-2006, 16:48
|
|||
|
|||
|
Quote:
Believe you me, I hesitated for a long time about asking my question and I certainly didn't expect or want individuals to say yes or no for themselves. That would be horrendously rude and innapropriate.
__________________
"God is dead"- Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche (1844-1900) "Nietzsche is dead"- God (1900) |
|
#18
03-07-2006, 17:09
|
||||
|
||||
|
a strong question asking for honest, dishonest, non comitting, face making, face saving and face destroying answers.
maybe too controversial for our bms, maybe too intrusive, but virtually compulsive to reply in some way. my own circumstance is documented in a thread i started without fear of critiscism or need for reaffirment of my choice in gf soon to be wife. some bms are honest about their start with their bg wives good on them, i present another view about my gf who i am about to marry. private information but interesting to the forum voyeur or perhaps the forum exhibitionist. would this question be asked on a forum about any other country perhaps some SEA ones ? not sure but i am sure some of our euro/us members would know. eg ex soviet bloc wives or wives from latin american/caribbean countries. |
|
#19
03-07-2006, 19:01
|
||||
|
||||
|
Quote:
You are right fun2have, its a very private information and nothing you would advertise at home.But also many BM´s already posted their story or asked for advice to the other BM´s in that situation, me included. If you dont name your problem , you cant get advice.After my trip i was confused and unsecure what to do and how to go further.What answers would i have got if i had said i would have met my GF at an high-Society party?And what would the answers have helped me in fact for my real problem at that time?Many Bm´s gave me good advice, with respect and thats why i respect this forum.If anybody doesnt want to answer the question, just dont post in this thread,always up to each one if or not. Many threads about "where is the best soapy??" or "where do i get a nice BJ"... etc. etc. but on the other side to feel offended if anybody just asks how many BM´s are married or in a relationship with ex-BG´s makes me laugh. To answer if a question like that would be posted in another forum i dont know, but this is not important and BTW the scene in eastern europe or how the most "Eastern-Girls" come to a marriage is in my experience much more different than in LOS.Its the GFE me thinks why most of the BM´s love and enjoy the TG´s and sometimes they fall in love for that.I am not an exhibitionist but as i already posted my story it would be foolish to do like i never met a BG or to hide where i met my GF. iTS HER PAST AND I LIVE IN THE PRESENT AND FOR THE FUTURE WITH HER: And YOU CAN BE sure : i dont wear a shirt :" I MET MY BIRD IN A BAR"
__________________
Never to old to make yourself a fool Especially in LOS
Last edited by shark1963 : 03-07-2006 at 23:22. |
|
#20
03-07-2006, 20:14
|
||||
|
||||
|
Quote:
Hi Shark, Just to lighten up the thread a bit, I'm also interested how many BM's are married or in relationship with ex-BM's Nevertheless...interesting topic for future "ex-BG" relationships and I can see how others get a bit annoyed with it after many years of asking. Greetz ub2yoo |
|
#21
03-07-2006, 20:24
|
|||
|
|||
|
The vast majority of ex-pats in long term relationships whom I know are with ex-bar girls. Obviously that is no surprise given the higher rate of interaction male falangs generally have with bargirls compared to non-bargirls.
Many of these relationships seem to me like the men have a live in maid whom they have sex with rather than a partnership in the 'western' sense. (That is not to say there is anything wrong with such relationships, or that my perception may not be wrong, or that there is not real love involved - just mean to say that falang-thai relationships seem different to falang-falang relatioships - thank goodness!) Personally, as lovely as many BGs are, I don’t see myself in a long-term relationship with one (but who knows) – not for any sexual morality reasoning, but simply because I have found it very difficult to find one with enough common interests. Good, stimulating conversation is hard to find with a BG - a worldly, well read, educated bargirl is not so common. but if I had an ex-bargirl wife: -Would I be comfortable home in Australia telling the locals my wife used to work in a bar and sleep with men for money? Defiantly no -Would I be comfortable in Thailand telling the locals my wife used to work in a bar and sleep with men for money? Yes… Perceptions / morality vary from culture to culture. A non-issue in one place may be a sensitive issue in another place. Anyone who has cross-cultural experiences has to deal with it - and deal with other peoples prejiduces - in which case silence is probably the best route when people are not open-minded. |
|
#22
03-07-2006, 20:38
|
||||
|
||||
|
Pretty much agreed FP..
Also on the subject of guys having GF's that are more akin to a live in maid.. I see this a lot and also think that for many guys thats part of the appeal, the total calling the shots, having the power, and in a way the replaceability of the girls is what some guys kind of power trip on. The girl better keep in line and behave the way he sees but he can do as he pleases. Not the basis for an equal relationship but many are not equal relationships. The flip side of the same coin is that many of the girls are justifyably less than 100% equal in some ways as they are (lord bless em) not the smartest or most worldly wise people you will ever meet. I have met some pretty street smart and sharp girls but even those are a minority. Many topics are completely out of thier league for even simple things (geography, natural history, contemporary history, pop culture, so many things).. In these cases the relationships are not equal really. I realize this statement sounds patronizing and I realize many with rose colored glasses may not think its true but the longer I am here the more I bercome aware that so much information is missing from thier knoweldge base that you really do need to adjust a little in expectations.
__________________
Men have only 2 emotional states, hungry and horny.. So ladies, if you see me without an erection, make me a sandwich. |
|
#23
03-07-2006, 20:46
|
||||
|
||||
|
Interesting thread, personally I see no reason to take offence at the original question posted, as it was asking info on long term relationships with TG's, not asking people if their girlfriend/wife was a bg. However it is also a very hard question to answer, I'm in a long term relationship and everything to date is fine, no probs, no money requests, everyday is good. How many people in relationships in Germany if asked today would give any different answer and if asked in 5 years when maybe they have spit up or divorced, in other words how do we know, its good so far. It sounds like a request to get reassurance that you can have a good relationship with a Thai - answer you can. Would you be ridiculed if you took her back home - you would, she will look younger than you even though she might not be, she will be slimmer than mates farang wives and girlfiends, will have a pleasant smiling attitude to all and basically in jealousy they will immediately say you bought her or she was probably working in a brothel, you will get idiots making their funny comments like, 'lub you long time' etc. If you live here you will not really ever be accepted into Thai culture but tolerated, you will see everyone thinking the girl you are married to or with, must be a bg and you will get some idiots trying to hit on your girl. Heck made it sound so bad but if you love her and get on well, so fecking what!!!!! The answer is yes you can have a good relationship with a thai girl and this i |
