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#1
05-01-2005, 19:35
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Just got an Email from a BG...
I have just got an email from a BG I spent a week with in July, And you have guessed it, She has asked for money which is the first time she has...
Here's what the letter says.... Hello alan, How are you? But im not well because I have no work and no money and also no happy in new year. What can I do? Its quiet here in patong. How can I get the money? I hopefully you can send me some money to live I will pay for food in each day, Please,Please because I dont have anyone to help me right now. But as much as I would like to believe her, I just cant and there's a few reasons why... 1) She says she has no work? Well I know for a fact that is not true because she was seen dancing around on her bar only a few nights ago as I have asked several BMs to ask about for her to see was she ok after the Tsunami and they all seen her at her bar. 2) She said she has nobody else? She has a very short memory because she told me her LT boyfriend(2Yrs) was coming to see her in december and another BF No2 was coming to see her in january. And she has just come back from bkk(Prob with LT boyfriend) and was not even in patong for the tsunami plus her room is nowhere near where the damage was? 3) She only asked after I sent her an email asking her to let me know if her and her friend was ok? 4) When I was there I caught her out lying to me on numerous occasions. I really would like to believe her but I just cant and I was even going to spend a bit of time with her in april when im there but now ill have to rethink that aswell.. What do you guys think? Am I being a bit harsh? Or should I just believe my gut instinct which is normally right?
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LIFES A BIT*H THEN U MARRY 1 
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#2
05-01-2005, 19:41
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sorry to say but trust your instinct...
u r surely not the only one posted the same email from her... 
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#3
05-01-2005, 19:53
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evidence suggest her request is unjusticfied, so logic dictates you to reject her, but as to what to do then i supposed it depends on how much you like her and if you're willing to overlook her lies. wish my answer could be more concrete. sorry.
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#5
05-01-2005, 20:29
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Difficult to judge in this situation - only thing that is certainly true is that it is very quiet here - Air Asia cancelled flights (Phuket-Sing) as only getting 3 passengers/flight! Friends here reporting drop off in business in all areas - bars/retail/property, so we have entered the tough part of this crises - just hope things pick up soon or will certainly see more posts like this one.
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#6
05-01-2005, 20:35
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Strange! The bg's I know, and mailed me they were ok, did not complain or asked me for money!
There are several kinds of girls out there! There are the ones, who take they job seriously and are very honnest and just give you pleausure for the bucks! Then there are girls taking advantage of every situation, to get money out of a farang! I would say "up to you"! If you don't mind of giving this girl an extra, because you had a good time with her, why not! As long as you know, she is always taking advantage of you. . On the other hand, competition must be tougher now! So if you can spare a dime. But if my bg's do not ask me money, it is maybe because their "code" is a bit more respectful then this girl...
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#7
05-01-2005, 20:46
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Friend of mine got a `send money please` letter too. I think everyone has to decide for himself. If you realy had fun with the girl and you want to go back and have more fun see a little pay as an investment in future fun. Or if you just want to be a good samarian give her anyway. If you donīt believe the story and/or you do not want to give money away for nothing-let it be.
How it is said in LOS: Up to you.
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#8
05-01-2005, 21:23
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Hey Allybabba22,
I agree with a few of the other bm's, and judging by your post, it seems that your in a fairly hard spot at the moment.... personally believe that you need to trust in your instincts, and i'm sure you will make the right decision  cheers
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Just Relaxxx!!!! 
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#9
05-01-2005, 22:09
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dont send anything????
i would not send anything to her.when you meet her later and if she is desperate you can see for your self.
but 99.9% of the time you would be crazy to send money to a bg even in these difficult times in los. cheers ab
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#10
05-01-2005, 22:12
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Quote:
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#11
05-01-2005, 23:55
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For me, I would not believe her story... But out of goodwill, maybe I just her send a small amount, a token out of goodwill. An amount that won't hurt my pocket. Why?. Because I will probably be coming back to LOS and.....
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#13
06-01-2005, 02:03
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Belive she just trying to get MORE money out of the Tsunami-Situation
cs//
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#14
06-01-2005, 04:21
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Quote:
Thanks guys, Well before I even wrote this thead I had already replyed back and told her I knew she was lying to me and that ill have to rethink about going back to see her, Which I already have and I wont be, The only thing that made me think for a while when I have recieved this email was because of what happened with the tsunami, But im 99% sure she is trying to take advantage of that, And probably thought that this was her opportunity to make a bit of extra cash which is sad, But its her loss because I treated her really well and paid her more than the norm and gave her a bit of extra money when I left, Ahh well back to being a butterfly I really dont know how im going to cope with that  
__________________
LIFES A BIT*H THEN U MARRY 1
Last edited by allybabba22 : 06-01-2005 at 04:23.
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#15
06-01-2005, 04:28
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I myself feel strange or actually i don;t understand. I think bgs might not earn a lot of money, but must earn enough for themselves, for their family and always - like the nature of most women - always save money in case bad situations could happen to them. How can they say that they don;t have money right after the tsunami? As I think that this bad situation (less jobs, less customers) will not last very long, no one could be in such a deadly situation like ali's bg said.
Just my thinking! I had seen two women recieved money from their ATM foreigners, and cursed them because those men didn;t send them enough money as they wished.. and do you know where those women were? At a jewel store which located next to the post office where they got the money.
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#18
06-01-2005, 12:49
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Dissagree.. Fairly extensive long term experience tells me that many of these girls have no savings whatsoever.. They spend everything they have and live for today.. Even if making large sums it gets consumed by family / parents / children / etc... Friends 'borrow' during periods when they have support etc... A prime example of this was my first wife who was making >100k Euro a year when I met her, at the same time she had no savings at all !! She had 1000 Euro haircuts, 600 Euro gucci boots, bought a MR2 for her previous husband, gave 1000's to her family, etc.. No sense of planning for the future They do normally provide thier own kind of networked safety net cause as one girl is flush the next is down and they do tend to help each other out a lot.. But when they all get caught out at once (like now) it does get tough
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Men have only 2 emotional states, hungry and horny.. So ladies, if you see me without an erection, make me a sandwich.
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#19
06-01-2005, 14:09
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I totally agre, LivinLOS. I have never seen a BG saving money... easily earned, easily spent. So, although this BG from Patong has still her room, clothes, etc..., she may ned money to help her friends who have lost more. I know some BG's in Kamala who were living in rooms close to the beach and have lost everything in the Tsunami. Many of them have lost their money, bed, clothes, etc... I know a BG who only owns a seat now. If we send money to a BG right now, I am sure she will not take advantage of it to go to disco or make a party, but she will use it mainly to help her friends. Maybe I am wrong, ut I know the solidarity between the girls is really strong and those who have money or can send email to any of her farang bf will try their best to help those who need and sometimes can't write in a good enough english, except the sentences they learned, like miss you, love you, etc... Like some BM's have already written, I would say follow you instinct. Be sure your money will help but you can also help Red Cross, private or public organisations ... Up to you.
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Domi
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#20
06-01-2005, 14:55
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Old softie speaks up.....
I love jumping into these discussions and being the dissenting vote. Thanks to you BMs who helped find her, I got an email from my fiance's best friend telling me that my GF is okay. I sent the friend an email back asking how her and the girls of the Hawai Bar were faring and she replied, not well, but did not ask for money. I sent an email back to her offering money to help her and the other girls and in response I received one of the nicest emails I think I have ever received, and still no request for money. Maybe that was out of respect for me, or for my GF, but the offer still stands. I am definitely an old softie at heart. I figure if I can reach out and help someone and not break the bank in the process....then why not? Will I ever get the money back? Nope. Will I ever get anything in return? Nope. Do I want anything? Nope. Maybe they would go out and blow it all on new cel.phones (I doubt it), but who cares. In MY mind I would have done the right thing. IMHO it is all personal choice, but it I think it really helps if you do not expect anything in return. Just do it because you want to and it makes you feel good.
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#21
06-01-2005, 16:03
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When you compare their income with the thai average income the most are far over that, a waiter I once new told me she earns about 6k a month. You know the average bg prices. So just count.
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#22
06-01-2005, 16:19
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True Diver, but these girls send a lot to their family! They don't spend so much on theirselfs!
You know Tig, I went to her, misserable, expensive room! Almost no clothes, no jewelery at all, not even a small tv! She really send what she can home! I don't know if all the girls are so "good", but I guess most of them support their family heavelly! That is why I never give them "extra money", but prefer to buy something they like to wear and will not sell...
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#23
06-01-2005, 16:21
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Helping Out
In my little extended Thai family I have seen how it works. When there is money from one girl it is shared with the other sisters. Thai girls are very big on village culture. It is a kind of quasi communism.
If I was in your situation I would write and ask directly what is required and what it is for. THB 10,000 can make quite a difference. Face is important. But, if your gut instinct is that this young lady will simply piss it up against the wall then obviously reserve your judgement and save your money. I have sent THB 20,000 directly to someone I know in Thailand rather than the Red Cross because I know it will be used to help affected people directly who have been kind to me. I do not expect any pay back. Mac
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#24
06-01-2005, 19:10
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Its funny but after reading a few of the last few posts im starting to feel a little bad even though I only know her for 8days
 Maybe I should not have being so quick to jump to conclusions, Maybe I should have thought about it before I wrote back telling her in no uncertain terms that I will not be sending money and that she was lying about everything, And that I did not believe her story  Shit I would really feel like a complete wanker if she really was telling the truth Now dont take this the wrong way, I am not like some other BMs who wants to find a girl to settle down in los with, Even though I like this girl as im not totally heartless, Because 80% of the time she was good fun and a good laugh to be around , But if I am honest I have no intentions of ever settling down with a girl in los  I still think that I have done the right thing even though I feel bad, I just hope now that I wont have any problems with her when I get to los because I didnt send her money, And because before she sent me that email I had told her I would come and see her on my next tour which I seriously doubt will be happening now, And to make matters worse she works in tiger so its going to be very hard to avoid her What do you guys think, As someone mentioned about her losing face because I didnt send any money? Do you think she will pester me when I get there or just bad mouth me to everybody that she sees me with? Anybody been in a similar situation before I would like to know what you guys have experienced or think on the subject....
__________________
LIFES A BIT*H THEN U MARRY 1
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