moral of the story

[Coolhand]

The teacher gave her fifth grade class an assignment: get their parents to
tell them a story with a moral at the end of it.
The next day the kids came back and one by one began to tell their stories.

Ashley said, "My father's a farmer and we have a lot of egg-laying hens.
One time we were taking our eggs to market in a basket on the front seat of
the car when we hit a big bump in the road and all the eggs went flying and
broke and made a mess."

"What's the moral of the story?" asked the teacher. "Don't put all your eggs
in one basket!" said Ashely. "Very good," said the teacher.

Next little Sarah raised her hand and said, "Our family are farmers too.
But we raise chickens for the meat market. We had a dozen eggs one time but
when they hatched! We only got ten chicks, and the moral to this story
is, "don't count your chickens before they're hatched." "That was a fine
story Sarah", said the teacher.

"Michael, do you have a story to share?" asked the teacher. "Yes, my daddy
told me this story about my Aunt Judy. Aunt Judy was a flight engineer in
the Gulf War and her plane got hit. She had to bail out over enemy
territory and all she had was a bottle of whiskey, a machine gun and a
machete. She drank the whiskey on the way down so it wouldn't break and
then she landed right in the middle of 100 enemy troops. She killed seventy
of them with the machine gun until she ran out of bullets. Then she killed
twenty more with the machete until the blade broke. And then she killed the
last ten with her bare hands."

"Good heavens," said the horrified teacher! "What kind of moral did your
daddy tell you from that horrible story?"

"Stay the f%*& away from Aunt Judy when she's been drinking" said Michael.