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#1
09-04-2007, 16:18
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English course for FL tilak?
Hi! I have been reading the board for a long time, but this is my first post. I have been a regular visitor to Phuket for three years now and love it every time! Big thanks to all you veterans sharing your wisdom!
Perhaps the most frequent advice on the board is not to fall in love and I have been doing quite well in that category... uptill now  ! I have been seeing this girl for about three weeks now and I would really like to help. Will not bore you with her sob story, but I'd like to help her in a more sustainable way than to just give her some cash.Finally - my question: Would a short term English course, for example on offer from Patong Language School, improve her employability by much? She only has the standard mandatory education, did not go to high school. Would it also give her access to a salary that can truly improve her life? Nothing unusal in her story (mother sick, she divorced with son etc), but if I become a passive sponsor her family would only become more dependent on her and she more dependent on me... Appreciate any help you can give me!! 
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#2
09-04-2007, 17:21
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At first I didn't want to touch this as there is not much to go on really, but you seem like you have a real intent to be helpful with her so I'll take a poke here. First re: English... yes, it will improve her employability, but to what? Call centre agent, receptionist, waitress, hotel bartender, retail/vendor sales? All jobs with limited income potential. I don't think you will ever be just be a "passive" sponsor, but if you are willing to pitch in 10 to 15K per month, and she were willing to earn 6K to supplement (if the need were there), she may be willing to stop her FL trade. I don't know what kind of income it would take to get her to stop FL'ing, you'd have to ask her. But, if your goal is to be just a "passive" sponsor, it is not going to happen...due to her limited income potential on her own, due to her limited education. Last edited by TanMan : 09-04-2007 at 18:03. Reason: more info
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#3
09-04-2007, 22:06
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Anna's Langauge School
I had good luck with Anna's Langauge School.
Their website is here although there were some problems loading the images. All the text seemed to be fine. Just my $.02. Best of luck in your endeavo(u)rs.
__________________
Non illegitimi carborundum est. - Don't let the bastards grind you down. Last edited by Capt. Fantastic : 09-04-2007 at 22:10.
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#4
09-04-2007, 23:46
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funny you mention these jobs i sponsor my gf i plan on her coming to canada she has a chance to work in a hotel in Koh Chang i dont care about the 6-7k she can earn as much as i do the experience that she will gain that will help her maybe get a job in the west or give her a skillset for the future to the OP, i would suggest anything that helps broaden your gf's horizions
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#5
09-04-2007, 23:52
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That's not passive Marc ;-)) I would classify your sponsorship as quite active with future plans of being together.
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#6
09-04-2007, 23:56
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oh, i didnt mean that(i am quite active in sponsorship, thats about all im active at with her at the moment!!) i was quoting more about the jobs that a girl can get
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#7
10-04-2007, 19:44
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You seem to be missing a big point....does she actually want to do something like take an English course? Does she even want to stop freelancing??
I believe a lot of girls agree to doing courses and the like cos they are pushed into it to appease sponsors, not cos they actually want to or intend to use them for anything!!
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#8
10-04-2007, 20:11
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Good advice - more questions
Thanks for taking an interest, guys!
I do believe that she is genuinely interested in learning more English, but the motive could be to improve her FL'ing - not to make a real career move. I understand, and partly share, your sceptisism. As TanMan points out, not many jobs can even begin to compete with the income level of FL'ing for a young, attractive girl like her. When I talk to her, she seems very willing to try a reception job at a hotel, but the problem is (as with many girls) that she knows after three months behind a desk she'll have earned the same as a good week at Tiger/Tai Pan etc. I guess I was hoping for some success stories here and Marc26 gives me some hope here - maybe it is possible to "save the girl"... I keep getting these images of Richard Gere and Julia Roberts flashing before my eyes! Do you see any other, possible solutions? I do not want to move to Thailand and I cannot take her to Kosovo. I really like her and would like to do something to improve her life on a long-term basis. Sorry for being a naive newbie!
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#9
10-04-2007, 20:18
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She may not think there's much wrong in her life? Does she really hate it? Would she prefer to earn the same money 'working' a few nights a week, or spending 6 days x 12 hours sat behind a reception? Some girls would never become a FL, so would go for the reception job. Others I reckon would jump at the chance for a bit of sponsorship alongside a regular job, and others wouldn't give up FL'ing for the world...... Make sure you've found which one she is before you part with cash. It may be that a bit of cash slipped her way every now and again would ensure that she got a 'normal' job and she could stop FL'ing. Then again, since you won't be in Thailand, you'll never know LOL. But I know what you mean about wanting to 'save' them, so good on ya.
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#10
10-04-2007, 20:25
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She needs to want to "save" herself before it is worth your facilitating that change of direction. English is important, but without additional formal education, it is going to be hard for her to earn more than 4-6,000/month. That would be a big drop in her FL income. So again, commitment needs to come from here. That aside, it isn't uncommon for them to just pocket the money. Say that you expect to see a certificate when done. And in case she might feel clever with a photocopy machine, be clear you'll be contacting the school to verify. Setting out strict terms from the outset will help you gauge her interest going in. If she resist, just drop the whole thing.
__________________
Women with a past and men without a future grope and shuffle on the dance floor.
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#11
10-04-2007, 21:13
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Even if she does want to change her 'career' and does start school, she qualifies and gets a hotel reception job and has a greater respect for herself anf feels 'saved' then she will get the constant income requests from mumma, who will not be so understanding, cos mumma needs to pay the down on her bike this month and needs 2k, friends still in the business will be telling her about the 4k short time they pulled last night and in no time unfortunately she will be back in some guise to Fl again, note most hotel girls freelance.
Nice sentiments and very well meant but realistically not going to happen statistically. Before you guys say it, no this is not cynical but just real life here. My advice, wait to save her or someone else when you can afford the time to come and live here.
__________________
If I havn't done it already, then i'm gunna do it today.
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#12
10-04-2007, 21:35
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Spot on. However, I beg to differ about 'most hotel girls' freelance...... Definitely some- I'm not sure about most.......defo more in Patong tho than other places in LOS
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#13
20-04-2007, 22:25
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End of story
Hello again!
Just wanted to share the end result with you guys: We went to Anna's and Patong Language School together to check out the course before signing up, but found the courses to not really be what we were looking for. Both schools offered flexible courses on the basic level, but her "speak easy" English makes it quite difficult to find a constructive level. For example, she did not have a problem with reading and understanding vocabulary on level 8 (top level), but she ran into severe problems on level 2 with third person of "to do" (do/does). There was no point for her going through a three-month course not learning more, but learning more correct English. (Well, there is of course a value to learning more correct English, but anyone who has been to Thailand know that the value is close to zero here...) So, the English course is out the window!  However, the positive side to the story is that we are communicating on a lot more meaningful and constructive level when discussing other options (as opposed to me being fed the "sick buffalo" story).Anyways, thanks for your valuable advice - I learn something every day on this forum!
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