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#1
12-05-2007, 20:45
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do's and don'ts for your first trip (IMVHO)
After reading the slating someone got for regurgitating a top ten list cut and paste from elsewhere I thought i would give it a go myself. Of course as the title says this is in my very humble opinion. There is no particular order and some of the entries are massive generalisations or throwaway comments.
The whole point about this magical yet alien (to 'us') place is that you can make your own way. However forewarned is forearmed and all that....... 1. do go to phuket before pattaya 2. do bring an open mind and wallet but not an open mouth 3. do not take any pictures at all 4. do not send emails home to anyone about your exploits 5. do always use a condom 6. do always use viagra 7. do go with a ladyboy at least once (though do not tell anyone for at least a year even if you liked it more) 8. do shower and change your clothes after the beach before you go out (and that does not just mean put a fresh singha vest on) 9. do not wear socks 10. do not see the same girl twice 11. do not ask a girl to do anything you think will be nice or fun for her (you will be wrong) 12. do not attempt to speak thai or offer a 'wai' 13. do not think they are all scheming supervixens 14. do not think they are all poor innocents who need rescuing 15. do not think that more money will make her 'feel' anything for you 16. do not pay over the odds 17. do not beat the girl down a few hundred baht (you are still paying hero and what is the difference to you) 18. you are not big, clever or handsome 19. do not attempt to persuade her that her dark skin and small body is attractive (you will never succeed)(she knows its attractive to you but your opinion does not count) 20. do not give anything other than a name, a country and a job when asked (not yours obviously) and no matter how you plead poverty remember all farangs who come to thailand have money 21. do not be offended by the word farang - regardless of what anyone tells you it is derogatory but don't worry about it 22. do not buy a bar or dream of living here - go home and have a good think about what is what young man 23. do remember that everything here including your own thoughts and feelings are total bullshit - there is a deeper level going on but do not even try to work it out, you will only get a sore head 24. do not think about how much time, energy, emotion and money you wasted on your ex-wife/s in comparison 25. do remember there is always someone else better (that goes for you and her) 26. do get out of patong during the day but do not hire a chopper or sports bike 27. do go to different bars and clubs each night 28. do not blindly follow anyone else's advice (mine included) 29. enjoy yourself 
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#3
12-05-2007, 20:52
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do not post on forums huray or boo-hoo one liners
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#4
12-05-2007, 23:32
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1. do go to phuket before pattaya -AGREE
2. do bring an open mind and wallet but not an open mouth - DISAGREE with open wallet.If you don`t keep some watch on what you spend your money will disapear faster thatn a snowman on the sun. 3. do not take any pictures at all - DISAGREE - why ever not? 4. do not send emails home to anyone about your exploits - AGREE - getting bargirls is like shooting fish in a barrel and therefore nothing to brag about. 5. do always use a condom - AGREE 6. do always use viagra - DISAGREE - up to you 7. do go with a ladyboy at least once (though do not tell anyone for at least a year even if you liked it more) - DISAGREE - if you want to then up to you, if you don`t then thats fine too surely?! 8. do shower and change your clothes after the beach before you go out (and that does not just mean put a fresh singha vest on) - AGREE 9. do not wear socks - DISAGREE - up to you. socks can deter mossie ankle bites 10. do not see the same girl twice - DISAGREE - up to you 11. do not ask a girl to do anything you think will be nice or fun for her (you will be wrong) - DISAGREE -- she may suggest shopping but she might suprise you with something you like too 12. do not attempt to speak thai or offer a 'wai' - DISAGREE - nothing wrong with saying hello how are you in thai or responding to a wai. 13. do not think they are all scheming supervixens - AGREE - but remember money comes first for the majority. 14. do not think they are all poor innocents who need rescuing - AGREE - if you want to rescue victims give money to charity 15. do not think that more money will make her 'feel' anything for you - AGREE - in fact if you pay over the odds she will think you are an idiot 16. do not pay over the odds - AGREE - see above 17. do not beat the girl down a few hundred baht (you are still paying hero and what is the difference to you) AGREE for a few hundred but theres nothing wrong with negotiating if the initial price is excessive. 18. you are not big, clever or handsome DISAGREE - Yes I am! 19. do not attempt to persuade her that her dark skin and small body is attractive (you will never succeed)(she knows its attractive to you but your opinion does not count) DISAGREE - never any harm in telling a girl that shes good looking, even if shes heard it a hundred times before. 20. do not give anything other than a name, a country and a job when asked (not yours obviously) and no matter how you plead poverty remember all farangs who come to thailand have money - AGREE if your just butterflying 21. do not be offended by the word farang - regardless of what anyone tells you it is derogatory but don't worry about it - DISAGREE - farang can be derogatory or neutral dependent on context and intent. 22. do not buy a bar or dream of living here - go home and have a good think about what is what young man - AGREE - only a tiny numbers of farangs can make a go of running a bar. DISAGREE - As for living here it`s possible if you have an income from farangland. 23. do remember that everything here including your own thoughts and feelings are total bullshit - there is a deeper level going on but do not even try to work it out, you will only get a sore head AGREE 24. do not think about how much time, energy, emotion and money you wasted on your ex-wife/s in comparison DISAGREE - always good to compare thai girls to farang women. 25. do remember there is always someone else better (that goes for you and her) AGREE - but try and be happy with what you have. 26. do get out of patong during the day but do not hire a chopper or sports bike DISAGREE - bikes scooter are a great fun way to get around but the roads are very dangerous 27. do go to different bars and clubs each night - AGREE - and try different foods etc 28. do not blindly follow anyone else's advice (mine included) - AGREE 29. enjoy yourself - AGREE - its your holiday/life
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#6
13-05-2007, 10:02
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Be kind to your knees.. You'll miss them when thier gone.
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Men have only 2 emotional states, hungry and horny.. So ladies, if you see me without an erection, make me a sandwich.
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#7
13-05-2007, 10:19
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Someone else who remembers that song by Baz Luhrmann
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"管它黑貓白貓，會抓老鼠的就是好貓"
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#9
14-05-2007, 17:55
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good post..agree with most of your points........except the ones in red............
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ROLL ON OCTOBER........
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#10
15-05-2007, 12:36
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Jonny,
Just a couple of questions for clarification ...  Would you agree to ... go to Phuket before Pattaya, (I read before as over)go with ladyboy at least once (as a rule)
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#11
15-05-2007, 12:47
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Number 29 is pretty much the one and only thing I do, well, did over there... During my first trip I had a number of rules and do/don'ts I would follow yet I ended up doing everything I wasn't suppose to do 555555 Same thing on the following trips but everything turned up really good for me, I guess because there was one thing I always did and will always do, and that's enjoy my self and live my life to the fullest  Thanks for your good post!
__________________
The man who said "A bird in the hand's worth two in the bush" has been putting his bird in the wrong bushes.
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#12
15-05-2007, 12:56
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Never ever, but again it is personal choice in the end. The dark side is not some where I personaly want to go and I am sure there aremany others here that agree.
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#13
15-05-2007, 19:48
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clarification - was not saying patts better or worse - suggest first timer should visit phuket first
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#14
15-05-2007, 20:41
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#15
15-05-2007, 20:50
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I was not going to post as this in the Newbie section and we supposed to 'gentle' to posters in here - but having read this thread a few times I felt I needed to say something. These aremy opinions - they may or may not be very humble but take it or leave it - everyone will come here and have a unique experience and I hope for everyone that it is an enjoyable one. Chok Dee!
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Its My Life ..........! Last edited by K2 : 15-05-2007 at 20:54.
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#19
16-05-2007, 02:05
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yep, here  I think I even have it somewhere on my computer...
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#20
22-05-2007, 04:57
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I'd like to add the following bits of advice for newbies, more general than specific to LOS. My grandfather traveled to far-flung places, including Asia, in the late 1800's and early 1900's. He died before I was born (my father was the youngest of 11 children), but he did pass on some advice about traveling abroad that my dad gave to me. I'm sure it isn't original, I've seen many variations of it in written form, but he had two major points:
1) The night before you depart, lay out all the clothes and gear you plan to take on your trip. Put beside that all the money you have saved or borrowed for your travels. Reduce the amount of stuff you're taking by half and double your money, then you'll have a good trip. The second one is still applicable to many parts of the world and even many parts of Thailand, but obviously not all of it in every LOS situation.  2) In countries where the people don't speak English, keep your eyes and ears open, your mouth shut, your money safe and your pants buttoned. Offer the men tobacco and leave the women alone. Evil Last edited by Evil Penevil : 22-05-2007 at 05:00.
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#21
22-05-2007, 09:49
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your grandfather was obviously a very smart man - very good points which just goes to show we can all learn from our elders - trouble is there aint too many more 'elder' than me.......5555555555555
__________________
to err is human........but to shift the blame to someone else shows management potential
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#22
23-05-2007, 02:57
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