Phuket Nightlife

sanshou03 · #1 17-11-2003, 23:30

Just got back from my first trip to phuket and now I understand why people just say **** it, drop everything and move there. ONe question though. In my week there I met this great girl, she was real cool and straight up with me, I stayed with her three nights and she never charged me, aeven offered to pay half for the room on the first night. Does this sound too good to be true? What are the chances that I'm being set up here?

mikegb · #2 18-11-2003, 00:50

Hi,

Every situation is different. Not all the girls are callous and want to strim you. Some do want to escape the whole situation and use finding a 'good man' as a way out.

I think the question has to be - What do YOU want out of this?

Are you ready for a relationship with a girl from a completely different culture?

They are very family/money orientated. Would you be happy spending a lot of your money on someone elses family who you don't know and can't even talk properly with?

The question I always ask is - What makes ME any different to all the other men who she has been with before me. The answer is usually nothing. Most of the men that go to Thailand treat the girls fairly well. You have only known her for a couple of days, but they make you feel as if they are the most important person in the world.

If they can find someone who can improve their life, then I think they will take that option.

Personally, I feel that if you fall for a thai girl, then YOU should move to Thailand and not expect them to move away from their friends and family.
To me it is like taking a beautiful parrot out of the trees. They look good in a cage, but you kill them. The look much better in their own environment.

Each to their own, but I personally like to treat the whole place as a magical experience for a few weeks at a time.

Let us know what you decide to do!

jsd · #3 18-11-2003, 11:27

hi sanshou03,

I just want to tell you be careful. Most of the girls are very clever in Thailand. It's not because they don't ask you money, they're ready to leave everything and follow you everywhere in the world. I know many of them who don't ask money the first time. What do they want ? They want you to think that you're the most important person and after a while you'll be ready to do everything. Some tricks usually used by them : "My Mother is sick and has to go to hospital ...", "the motorbike of my brother is broken and he has no money to repair it ..." ... All these tricks don't come from me but good thai girl friends. As Micke told you in his reply, they're very Family/Money oriented. And I would like to say not only thai girls, but girls in Asia. I'm living in Singapore for quite a while and starting to have a good experience on Asian life style.

I hope I'm wrong and I didn't break your illusion.

Jsd

r3aps · #4 18-11-2003, 14:02

i understand how you fall for the girls mate i have similar problem but am fighting the urges as i have read and heard many horror stories here.i met girl i really like on first trip and spent a week with her.i went back in september and she didnt no i was going,i bumped into her sister who told her and she foned me saying why i not tell her as she would of come to see me,but she had just started working in bar in pattayya and had to work the month out.i went back 12 days ago and she got bus from bangkok to patong to spend 5 days with me,i was happy and went out with her many nites introducing her to nicke and my friends.she is a lovely girl and i have to fight my emotions to not fall for her,she has had bad medical problem and is very truthful,she is always very happy despite the crap she puts up with i believe in what she tells me about her work.she hates it,she tried other work but cannot live on the money as she has to help her mother father and little brother with money.during her stay weith me recently she payed to come see me out of her own pocket,never charged me for sex and bought me gifts and food etc.i can honestly say i could easily fall in love with her but am trrying not to.she telephones me about 4-5 times a week and texts me nearly every day as well as emails.she has never asked for anything from me and always says she loves me,and hates going with other men but needs the money which i understand.i would love to help her out of the business but i aint rich and i dont want to get suckered.she knows i am going to be back in thailand for a month in april and really wants to spend the month with her,she says i dont have to pay her.i would love to spend a month with her but worry that spending that long with 1 girl who i really like will screw my head up.so as yet i havent decided whether i will see her or not.she tells me she doesnt want her heart broken as she has had it happen 2 times and i believe she doesnt want to do the same to me.like mike said its better to move there,i would love to,if i could i could honestly say i would hook up with her but i cant.likewise i would love her to come here to the uk for a holiday but i have been told it not possible for bar girls to come to the uk for a couple of weeks holiday without going thru a load of hassle.
on my latest trip a few times i tried to be horrible to be kind if you no wot i mean and get with other girls but crying and arguments ensued so i stayed with her for the 5 days and was really happy.it screwed me up leaving.try not to fall for a girl i think i am starting to and really dont want to,i hate being here and thinking about her being with other men night and day.so i really hope you can put it behind you and i really hope i can try and get other her and say i cannot see her no more as i no if i see her just for say 1 day then i would spend rest of holiday with her.
be a man who-re i think its easier if you like that in thailand,emotions never follow that way.
steve

Werwolf · #5 18-11-2003, 19:21

I agree with mikegb and jsd!
If you gave your e-mail to the girl, I'm sure she write you a letter. First she tell you " I love you so much...". than a letter will come and tell you she have no money and do never work in a bar... and so on!!

I know from some BG, that they have prepared letters for each situation which they can send to the farangs!!

I don't hope you get one of them.

I say: be careful!!!!!

sanshou03 · #6 18-11-2003, 20:48

I actually met a guy while I was out there who used to write letters for bar girls in Samui. I wasn't planning on anything as drastic as moving out there and proposing, just wondering how I should feel if something goes down and she asks for money. Looks like I'll have to be careful. If this girl is gaming me though I have to say, I know some hustlers and she is good. By the way r3aps if you like this girl that much just sack up and go for it. Never pays to be too careful in my opinion. I have some commitment issues myself but damn. Thanks for all the help guys
-MIke

r3aps · #7 18-11-2003, 21:18

Quote:

Originally Posted by sanshou03

I actually met a guy while I was out there who used to write letters for bar girls in Samui. I wasn't planning on anything as drastic as moving out there and proposing, just wondering how I should feel if something goes down and she asks for money. Looks like I'll have to be careful. If this girl is gaming me though I have to say, I know some hustlers and she is good. By the way r3aps if you like this girl that much just sack up and go for it. Never pays to be too careful in my opinion. I have some commitment issues myself but damn. Thanks for all the help guys
-MIke

mate if i could i think i would but i have a good job here and have 13 years invested in it.i also have no colateral in the bank to fund any stay mainly because i spend all my money going over there.i just returned from 3rd trip in just over 5 months.
steve

divinebaal · #8 18-11-2003, 21:57

Quote:

Originally Posted by sanshou03

Just got back from my first trip to phuket and now I understand why people just say **** it, drop everything and move there. ONe question though. In my week there I met this great girl, she was real cool and straight up with me, I stayed with her three nights and she never charged me, aeven offered to pay half for the room on the first night. Does this sound too good to be true? What are the chances that I'm being set up here?

Being set up?? Well, as I understand it you are back home???

The local girls who works in bars can be the most calculating women you ever met.. but they can also be the real thing.

I have been in a bar where a girl comes with a huge bundle of money and starts giving cash out to the other bar girls. I was told that this particular girl had one german, one swedish and on brit who sent her money every month so she "didn't have to work with men". She got almost 800 USD, every month, sent to her.. and she still boinked the dudes in the bars.

I also have several friends who have met girls in a bar, fallen completly and are now married here in Sweden with his bar girl. And so far not many have used the line about stolen bikes, sick moms ...

You must remember that these girls comes from poor areas and gets a high living with booze (and drugs sometimes). When you visit LOS you are the King with a fat wallet. You bring the girl home and all of a sudden you are a cheap bastard.. since the cost of living back home is much higher and you don't party every night for 2-3 weeks as on the vacation.

You get all kind of girls but most of them want to get away from the bars and thailand and live with money, a nice house and a non-beating husband.. if that is love?? Nah.. They show you enough respect and friendship you might see that as love..

blah... enough BS...

Beware dude... not everything is black and white with these girls. You could (and will most of the time) get burned!!! Especially if the girl is a 20 yo 10-pointers... If she is 38+..then belive it!!!

sanshou03 · #9 18-11-2003, 22:46

She's 27 with a kid living back home.

Stallion27 · #10 19-11-2003, 02:58

Quote:

Originally Posted by sanshou03

She's 27 with a kid living back home.

Any chance her name is Kuy?????

sanshou03 · #11 19-11-2003, 03:01

nope, why do you ask?

Bobby · #12 19-11-2003, 15:00

Everything can happen...
At a certain time, I was in contact by e-mail with 6 different girls (both bargirls and freelancers. Some of them were freebies). After a few days, weeks or months, I received the famous e-mail from 4 of them asking me to send her money for various reasons. All those mails seemed to come fom the same template, including the bank account number, the bank location and swift code....
Sometimes, I wonder if some people are stupid enough to believe all what bargirls can say or write.... But unfortunately, when I ear some stories, it seems that that kind of man does exist

In my case, my answer to that kind of e-mails was:
wrong idea ! Bye bye !
Another funny solution may be to reply: I also have money problems, can you help me? Here is my account # ...
One of the 6 girls was a girl that I met in a bar in Bangkok (Golden bar). She spent a night with me and refused the money I gave her the next morning. She claimed that she doesn't need money as she has a regular boyfriend who send her 40000 B every months. Needless to say that she never asked me for money by e-mail after that. So, as I said earlier, everything can happen in Thailand.
Regards,
Bobby

divinebaal · #13 19-11-2003, 18:41

Quote:

Originally Posted by sanshou03

She's 27 with a kid living back home.

What do you really want to come out of it?? Compare that to your own age.

She could be the real thing but always be realistic and view them as "moneybags".

Sure, have contact with her and plan the next trip with her. But IF a mail drops with requests for money, then you know what to do. Just look at this thread about the standard scams. Not until she is in your home, in your country you can start to belive she won't do bars anymore.

I would rank the bargirls as:
1. Get a boyfriends mail and request money for sick relative
2. Get a boyfriends mail and request money so they don't have to do bars.
3. get a boyfriends mail and try to make him fall for me so he will take me back home so I can send money to Papa-san.

I would say that this goes for all bar/freelancer girls.

Hobbsy · #14 19-11-2003, 20:14

Well, i've been here well over a year now and have known a few bar (and non bar)girls as long term friends. On the whole all the above advice is good and true. Be wary.

But saying that the majority i know are nice girls who are sending money back home to help out their families, something few of us ever have or ever will do? They are money orientated and mostly this comes as competition between their friends, the usual one-upmanship in a quest for the biggest gold and latest mobile phone!

Being half way round the planet is the hard part as with any long distance relationship. Age +looks is also relevant a genuinely hansum man is sought after but not as much as someone they think will care for them. But you can look at it both ways also - a friend of mine went back to the UK for a while and constantly worried about what his g/f was up to. not much it seemed after a bit of checking around for him but when i quizzed him on his return he had shagged 4 women hehe! Works both ways.

As for worrying to much about falling for them, what the hell for? If you get burned you get burned and are slightly the wiser. You're just as likely to get emotionally hurt as anywhere else in the world. Life is about experiencing things imho so just do it with no regrets

mombasa · #15 10-06-2007, 21:02

Yup, a long time ago - my first visit to Phuket when it was a fraction of what it is now.

She just broke down in tears as we were walking down the road - I had 2 more nights left.

Never asked for money - although, of course, i sorted her out. Those were the days.